"AGAIN??! Step outside!"

Mrs. Stahl - after (yet another) thunderous fart from a classmate

"3°C out and the heater decides to not work. Can you think of a better way to start the day?"

Ms. Espenant - at 8:45am one cold January morning

"The height of this roof is about... uh... 3 Cussons"

Ms. Segeren - Grade 5 teacher "measuring" the height of the ceiling with a classmate

"No, USSR doesn't stand for the Soviet Union. It stands for 'Uninterrupted, Sustained, Silent Reading'. (long pause) Or better known as 'U Shut up, Sit down and Read!"

Mr. Avery - explaining what USSR was on our timetable

"All right then everyone! Have a listen!"

Mr. Avery - he just always said that

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